• Lad@reddthat.com
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    28
    ·
    2 days ago

    3, 4, and 5 I would tell to fuck off.

    1 and 6 meh.

    2 is probably the guy I would most want to listen to.

      • FireRetardant@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        22
        ·
        2 days ago

        Sometimes they are just trying to relate by going “yeah I’ve had a similar experience” but it can come off as selfish if they focus on it too much or cut off your story to tell theirs.

        • zout@fedia.io
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          3
          ·
          1 day ago

          I know. Specifically, I mean the kind of people where you can tell from the moment you start talking, they’re listening not to your story, but for a hook to turn the story about them. I have a coworker like that, if I tell a story about something that happened to me this week, he’ll tell a story about what happened to him or his family 20 years ago, which by the way is way worse/better. He is also always the hero in these stories. I find most of these people are deeply insecure and try to cover this with a big mouth. So, bully behaviour basically.

        • NegativeInf@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          9
          ·
          edit-2
          17 hours ago

          My ADHD tells me to try and empathize by sharing a similar experience. It took me so long to realize people were taking it as “one upping” now I just don’t share anything.

          • FireRetardant@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            4
            ·
            1 day ago

            Yea same here. I’ve learned to let to them get their full story out, then I ask if I may share a similar experience,