Hot lava, snow, rain, and fog. Long-neck giraffes and pet cats and dogs.

They just want to see your face before you masturbate. ;)

Wait until they start demanding an “after” picture.

Infamous Cave of Pooh

If a squash can make you smile… ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

You’re not how orbital mechanics work.

Land in ocean, suddenly Tom Hanks is involved.

See? They still landed amongst the stars.

Damn. That’s worth savoring.

That was the day OP learned to slice bread like a machine.

“When Putin nuts, I intend to keep sucking, folks.”

The Bible says Adam and Eve, not Adam in Southend-on-Sea.

Love the sinner, not the sin.

Strawberry eclair so it blends in.

Oh, I’ve touched a horse.

Agree to disagree.

Nicolas Cage’s The Wicker Man is the only John Wick spinoff worth your time.

I wish women’s screams still riled me. It’d sure make mornings a lot easier.

Not again. :(

Yeah, the witness statements are how I figured out Michael Shellenberger, historic witness #4, is the author of San Fransicko: Why Progressives Ruin Cities and Apocalypse Never: How Environmental Alarmism Hurts Us All.

I want to believe and all, but this ain’t doin’ it.