I can’t just listen to conversations people I don’t know are having, and randomly interject when I feel I have something relevant to say.

Damn, I feel that to my core. One of the few benefits people like us would’ve had in the pre-internet days, was that striking up casual conversations with strangers was considered more acceptable. Thankfully, my (also neurodivergent) father set an example for that when I was growing up - he chatted up everyone, and as a consequence seemed to know people no matter where he went. Yeah, some people probably thought he talked too much, but so what? He wasn’t bothered, and he occasionally made actual connections through it. At the very least, I imagine most people would recognize my father as a friendly guy.

I try to let that empower me, even though it’s much easier said than done. The thing is, if you go into a conversation expecting to be viewed negatively, it’s going to impact how the interaction goes. Also, something that took me a painfully long time to learn, is that internet strangers can’t substitute for therapy. Just because neurotypicals know how to do something, doesn’t mean they can explain how they do it. I held that same expectation through my youth, but since NTs never had to go through the socialization process step-by-step in order to learn it, expecting them to break it down the way you want them to simply isn’t going to happen.

That is, unless they’ve studied it and know how to give constructive advice that makes sense from your perspective. And at that point, you’re actually seeking a therapist anyway.

That definitely depends on the context. Women’s voices are often characterized as too whiny, too emotional, too bossy, too [insert sexist insult.] The content of what we say doesn’t matter. Some people just hear a woman’s voice and automatically tune out. Sadly, when you live it, it’s hard to avoid; I didn’t hate my voice for so many years for no reason.

Considering that virtual assistants like Siri only exist to follow user’s commands, it might be worth considering that people aren’t preferring female voices because they like them more. It’s possible that people feel more comfortable giving demands to a female voice than a male one.

Just some food for thought.

My family had a healthy idea of limits, closer to the “free range” philosophy, before such a term was required.

Our neighbors across the street, however, were the prototype for helicopter parents.

While my sibling and I gained confidence and navigational skills by biking around our confusing neighborhood before the days of GPS, the neighbor’s kids weren’t allowed to go down the street unsupervised. My siblings and I stood alone on the corner bus stop, but the neighbor’s mom sat in her car and only released her kids when the bus had arrived.

At the time, my parents made fun of theirs for holding such a tight leash. We also pitied the kids because they panicked about being “lost” when my siblings brought them on a walk around the block.

But now I see kids sitting in cars at bus stops as the norm. And of course, stories like the above article go to show that the helicopter style has won (for the time being.) The people who were raised to fear everything outside their front yard are now parents themselves.

I imagine that 10-20 years from now, there will be a lot more young adults bonding over vague memories of videos that they loved when little, but that they can’t find a shred of anymore. Creators will have risen and fallen through the years. Some will shut down their channels and retire, others will be demonetized, and yet more will simply disappear without a trace. There won’t be a backlog of every kids’ video on YouTube; it’s not like PBS or Nickelodeon, where popular shows might get officially archived. Instead, people will be left vaguely describing plots they can’t fully remember, all the while getting a weird look from those who don’t know what they’re talking about. They may even come to think, “Maybe I just dreamed it all up?” and give up on their search for nostalgic connection.

Until the day one person finds an old screenshot from whatever the show was and shares it. That’s when everyone will flip out because, Holy shit, that’s it! That’s the show! At which point, they will collectively and slowly realize just how messed up the show actually was.

Actual feminist and liberal guys should be understanding and supportive of women’s sexual/dating choices anyway. If they aren’t, then what kind of ally are they?

Elon Musk is a once in a generation business leader

That’s not a compliment, that’s a prerequisite to becoming everything Musk currently is. If “a generation” of people had been afforded even one percent of the privilege he’s received, Musk would’ve been outshined by more competent people long ago.

Goddamn, way to make me flashback.

There was a point in my life where I was facing homelessness, was constantly job searching but hearing nothing back, and had to count coins to make sure I could afford to eat each day. Not only that, but the closest family member, who had invited me to stay with them if things went tits up, had just died two days before in a sudden and tragic way.

And my then-bf dragged me to a bar, where he and all his friends told me to “just let it go” and “loosen up” as if the basement rock of my world hadn’t just eroded out from under me. I sure as shit couldn’t afford bar prices, and not a single one of the group offered to get me anything, leaving me stone sober while they all got shitfaced. I ended up crying alone in the bathroom for an hour, and when I came back out, “bf” was getting a fucking lap dance from his friend’s fiancee.

That wasn’t even the worst part of the night. It definitely got darker before the light returned.

I’m okay now, over a decade later, in an infinitely-better place with supportive friends and partners. But man, what a journey.

For wearing or for licking?

First make sure you’re not in one of the 30 states with Filial Responsibility laws. From that site: ”Filial responsibility laws impose a legal obligation on adult children to take care of their parents’ basic needs and medical care.”

Every state’s laws are different and some states have never enforced them, but it’s definitely something to be aware of. It also might be a good idea to start keeping records/documentation of fights in case you need to argue such a law some day.

You talk like all the adults that made life hell when I was 15. If anyone has to “earn” respect, it’s adults who forgot what it’s like to live under someone else’s thumb.

Covid killed at least 1,104,000 people in the United States to date. In 2020, about 385,000 were killed with Covid as a contributing cause. I can’t find numbers about the total deaths that occurred before election day specifically, but for the sake of simplicity I’m going to use the year total. Just note that the actual number of deaths by that time was somewhat lower.

We can subtract the number that had already passed in 2020 from the total number of deaths to date. That gives us over 716,000 people who died of Covid between the 2020 election and today, and therefore could not have voted in 2024. Also note that the 65+ crowd is historically the most reliable voting demographic by age and Covid laid into that same age group the hardest.

We can be upset at people who didn’t turn out to vote this election, but we can’t dismiss the significant chunk of 2020 voters who simply weren’t alive by 2024.

And it reeks because they “leave their mark” just like an unneutered cat.

You will find that if you lead with that, you’ll be perceived as negative. If you lead with all negative and no positives, you’re going scare everyone away. People who are cynical and negative are offputting. Positivity is a choice. Think about the people in your life. Are they positive or the “well ackshually” types? You may see it as a honest, but if you’re not showing your good side too, you are giving a dishonest picture. Give only as much negative as you give positive. Be honest when things come up. Trust is important.

@Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world The first paragraph here is key.

You sound very familiar to me. If my hunch is correct, then most of the above post probably doesn’t speak to you. Avoiding the overwhelming task of driving, being a quiet observer who can write better than they can speak, these aren’t matters of “eco friendliness” or “shyness” - these are aspects of yourself that have always distinguished you. I also share quirks that lead people to misunderstand the roots of my decisions.

Which is why I hope you will take note when I say, that first paragraph is solid advice that should best be heeded.

I have had to learn a lot of social skills the hard way. The amount of times I screwed up, but nobody had the guts to actually explain to me what I was doing wrong, made it so much harder to correct my mistakes. The above poster is providing that rare bit of honest feedback that can keep a person like you or me from having to learn a painful lesson the hard way.

Being positive is easier said than done, but it starts in small ways. For example, consider how conscientious you may be when writing. As long as you’re putting in the effort, it’s worth it to go back and see what can be re-phrased. Sometimes I re-read and edit my own writing over and again trying to get the tone right. (Which is much easier than controlling my tone when speaking.)

Ultimately, if you want things to get better, you’re going to have to put the work into it. I know nobody wants to hear that, but I also know that most attempts to help someone with a defeatist attitude are going to be brushed off. I simply hope that hearing from a like-mind that’s been there can help you see that it doesn’t have to be this way.

While getting started it felt positively gross the amount fo personal questions it was asking. Why is all that necessary?

Hi. Occasional period haver here. With all due respect, it’s possible that since the context is the menstrual cycle, questions that seem irrelevant to you (as a not-period-haver) might actually be important for the typical end user (period-havers.) Things like age, weight, diet, activity level, and more can all play a role in how someone’s period affects them. But I have no plans to download this, or any other tracker app, so I can’t independently determine the extent to which that’s the case.

Could anyone who signed up provide some specific question examples?

(Edit: Replied to the wrong post. Sorry!)

Nah, kids deserve more credit than that. I’m honest with kids (to an age-appropriate level) because it’s vital that they develop critical thinking skills. Considering the world they’re growing up into, they’re going to need all the training they can get to become able to discern fact from fiction.

I give kids legit reasons. I explore their “Why” questions. Then when I don’t know the answer, I’ll be honest but supportive, “I don’t know, but let’s find out.” We have to model what being a rational adult is like, and how we come to logical conclusions. Children aren’t going to learn this stuff from being brushed off or told some silly explanation.

That being said, it’s important to be smart about context. It’s reasonable and responsible to disengage from the conversation if someone demonstrates that they aren’t arguing in good faith, whether they’re an adult or a child. The problem is, a lot of adults jump to whatever explanation makes their own life easier, without any regard to how their response can shape the future adult they’re speaking with. If you’re truly concerned about kids’ futures, you have to acknowledge that there is a lot you know that kids don’t know yet. Offer them the benefit of the doubt and seize these opportunities to teach kids how to think for themselves.

deleted by creator

All work no play makes Jack the only coworker not invited when everyone meets up for drinks.

You’re right that Dems need better messaging and to stop catering to the ultra rich. At the same time, we can’t discount the propaganda messaging that the article mentions. Not being in their echo chambers means not being exposed to the bulk of it, and that is great. At the same time, it means being disconnected from what a lot of people are basing their opinions on.

For a few years, up until the start of this year, I had a job that required interacting with families in people’s homes. If I had a choice, I would’ve preferred to avoid the right-wingers… but gotta do what you gotta do.

Some households were pure poison: hate-driven parents who constantly belched up Fox news topics. These parents normally communicated with their kids through complaining and screaming. But if a kid made some quip about “Biden sucks,” they got a brief moment where their parents would actually laugh. The reinforcing power of that toxic dynamic cannot be understated.

It’s no wonder that a lot of kids in those circumstances end up eager to repeat the same crap their parents say. In the time that I worked that job, a lot of the commentary was Biden-centric, making him a convenient punching bag that even the smallest fists could reach (even if they had no idea what they were doing/saying.)

Dems have a lot of improvements to make, but it would take a lot more than “improved messaging” to overcome the sheer power of this propaganda culture.

I’m pretty sure this is it. It looks like mods straight-up razed the thread. There are comments remaining, but only after you scroll past the sea of deleted content.

I found one commenter that made a really interesting observation:

I think you and your sister have different definitions of what love means. You think love means you put up with bad behavior from your loved ones and she thinks love means you don’t behave badly towards your loved ones.