• TheFriar@lemm.ee
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    3 days ago

    Do I feel awkward watching two actors act? No. Do you?

    My point is, what makes you guys so uncomfortable with sex? Doesn’t that strike you as a little odd? Watching a movie with superfluous sex scenes with, say, your family, is definitely weird. But not because of the sex, but because you’re watching sex with your family there and that is awkward.

    Everyone keeps saying “if I want to see sex, I’ll watch porn.” But that’s…such a weird take, I think. It’s not about getting turned on by sex scenes or trying to get off. It’s just a portrayal of a pretty massive part of life that everyone seems scared of or something. I just don’t get that.

    • piccolo@sh.itjust.works
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      2 days ago

      It’s just a portrayal of a pretty massive part of life that everyone seems scared of or something. I just don’t get that.

      Perhaps if it was included for character development between two individuals, you might have a point. But a lot of time its just shoehorned and out of place. Also, for the record, its not a major part of life for many people, which creates even more disconnect.

      • DancingBear@midwest.social
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        2 days ago

        Um yea. Sex is a pretty major part of everyone’s life regardless of whether they have sex or have ever had sex.

          • AA5B@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            The proportion of people conceived by ivf and asexual through their lives, with no romantic interests ever, and no other connections to sex has got to be vanishingly small … more power to you if you are, but you can’t claim that’s the mainstream experience

            • DancingBear@midwest.social
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              2 days ago

              And most likely you would still have a menstrual cycle or a raging erection every morning.

              Sexuality is pretty integral to the human experience, even if you are asexual. It’s unavoidable.

              In IVF specifically the man generally has to jerk off to make the sperm donation.

            • piccolo@sh.itjust.works
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              2 days ago

              My comment about IVF was tongue and cheek as the person i replied to was being pendatic. Im aware most people are conceived via sex. But thats not really whats the point or the emotions that is being depicted in movies now is it?

              • DancingBear@midwest.social
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                2 days ago

                It’s really a tangent lol, but I just found it absurd that someone was suggesting sexuality is not apart of their lives, now I’m reading articles this morning about experiences of asexual folks and studies etc.

                Feeling low desire or feeling asexual is not necessarily a disorder, I think that’s why the distinction was made. In the past low sexual desire was treated as a symptom for a larger disease or issue.

                But this does not mean that sexuality is not a part of an asexual persons life. I’m just interested in the topic but I’m sticking by my point that sexuality is integral to the human experience whether you participate in sex itself or not.

                • piccolo@sh.itjust.works
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                  2 days ago

                  Sexuality may be a big part for some people’s lifes. But for others, it has virtually no part. Breathing is an intergal part of being alive, but you’ll spend 99.9% of you life never thinking about it. Sure its there, its a thing… but unless you actively think about it, it doesnt actually effect who you are.

                  • DancingBear@midwest.social
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                    1 day ago

                    But it does. I think I understand what you are saying. But you can’t just ignore all of human evolution that brought made us all who we are.

                    If you are a monk who has committed to celibacy and given up money, who only eats what people put into your begging bowl, money and sexuality are still apart of your life. I’m arguing that it is impossible to separate our sexuality from our existence.

                    This is not to negate someone’s lived experience at all in any way. Whether we want it to or not money and sexuality are an integral part of our lives.

                    Maybe if we live in a cave and never interact with any other human beings, idk.

                    But in the sense of a person who is an asexual or a monk who does not spend money, I see your point of view but it still is an important part of our lives, and their lives, if only because it affects so many our friends and family around us and in our lives, how we interact with others in the world.

                    Again, this is a huge tangent from the original post as you pointed out, it’s just interesting to me. I hope you’re having an awesome day 😊

          • angrystego@lemmy.world
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            2 days ago

            Sexual frustration is a massive part of peoples lives too. Only asexual people escape the influence of sex.

    • ihatetheworld@lemmy.ml
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      2 days ago

      When it comes to surprise sex scene yes. The whole thing is just awkward. But when i am watching a film and i am expecting it to happen then no.

      Uncomfortable with sex? No. My point was I don’t want to be watching an action movie and get a surprise sex scene that last too long and add nothing to the story. Maybe i am weird but clearly i am not the only one that appreciate a good film without those unnecessary sex scene. Otherwise we wouldn’t be seeing a steep decline of sex in films.

      • AA5B@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Maybe it does all come down to whether you think most sex scenes are randomly inserted to sell the movie, or are actually connected to the plot or character development. Clearly there are both, and which dominates might be related to what each of us watches

        • ihatetheworld@lemmy.ml
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          2 days ago

          I watch all kind of films and I have no issues with the latter. It is a good thing we are getting less of those unnecessary sex scene that add nothing to the story, plot or character development.

          • AA5B@lemmy.world
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            19 hours ago

            This is a benefit of sex being ubiquitous: you have to try a lot harder for shock value

      • TheFriar@lemm.ee
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        2 days ago

        Well I dunno if people not liking it is the reason we’re seeing a steep decline. If that were the case, we’d be seeing a steep decline in shitty movies. And that line is trending the other way.

        I personally think it’s more a sort of return to Puritanism—in some respects. People are, in fact, very touchy these days. I mean, the intention is good in those touchy people. We want to see less exploitation, see less offensive or unequal treatment of people. And that’s great. But I don’t think sex in film is inherently exploitative nor does it necessitate unequal treatment.

        But you know what else we’re seeing? A steep decline in young people having sex. Millennials were the generation having the least sex, until gen Z came along. Now they’re the generation having the least sex (in adolescence/young adulthood). I personally think there’s a connection there, too. We are more wary of anything that might get people upset—well, I say “we” but really I mean the capitalists. They want your money and will be as inoffensive as they think is necessary to get it. So really, what we’re seeing is a capitalist response to a seemingly more sensitive consumer.

        And that’s just shitty all around. Thanks once again, capitalism.