So… if you’ve kept up with my previous ditherings, then you know that I’m trying to help an elderly friend (“Calvin”) in my place hang on to what’s his. Me, I’ve known him for ~12yrs, but, really… that doesn’t matter. More like if I can possibly help someone, then that’s how that works, even if I wind up neglecting my favorite blog / community. Community!
But man, this shit has been a trial. For real.
I mean, for one, this funny guy evidently didn’t pay his electric bill for a godamn year And every time I talk to him about that now, I keep reminding him to pay his bill and fix his service, naturally. Me, I’ve tried contacting The Illuminating Company myself, but so far it seems that you have to be the actual approved phone# / acct# in order to access even the simplest of details about a person’s account. Eh, okay.
I’m just worried in general, tho.
Me and a friend did a whirlwind grand-cleansing of his apt for the upcoming annual inspections, but what’s that going to matter if he gets kicked out due to not paying his rent, you know? (even though he has the money?)
It’s just bloody-hell ridoinkulous.
And yes, every verdammt day I talk to him and beg him to take care of this stuff, and he says “yes, sure I will,” and then he does nothing.
It’s just… I’m not sure how to better describe this complete mess. It’s almost like Cal’s got this passive-aggressive need to take down anyone who cares about him.
I’m just lost, honestly, and my stress levels are through the roof. I really don’t know what the hell I’m supposed to do, here.
(sorry about my language, above…)
EDIT: FFS, he’s 75yo. He’s not 90yo. All of this would make more sense if Cal was 90yo…
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You can’t help somebody who won’t help themselves, and you shouldn’t sacrifice anything of yourself to do so.
If the dude has money to pay bills and just doesn’t… Then he’s beyond your help.
If the dude has money to pay bills and just doesn’t…
That’s a strong possibility IMO.
It’s so wild, though. I mean, he orders all these packages, and even just a couple weeks before all this, he had me over to watch an excellent Scottish police-detective series (“Vera”) that was super-clever and really cool stuff IMO.
That’s not some McHale’s-Navy type shizzle, you know?
My point is: Cal’s NOT mailing it in. In fact he’s quite sharp at 75yo, which brings me to…
*&@$#
I don’t get it.Like, what is his strategy here…?
So in a few weeks, I’m going to watch a good friend of mine’s belongings get tossed in the trash, and there’s nothing I can do about it…?
So ridiculous… yet here we are?
I´m sorry to hear that and hope he will pay on time. Maybe he has mental issues that keep him from doing it?
Actually Nackty, I think I have some of Cal’s disease-- like maybe we kinda keep losing hope and get increasingly paranoid upon paying?
Me, for example… I don’t know why… but there were times when I didn’t pay my bills for 2-3mos, and I was just screaming at myself. I mean, why, why… WHY?
That’s a rough situation to be in mate, it sounds like you are doing all that can be done. Do you know if he’s been fine up until recently or has always been like this? Just from the few I’ve known closely around that age it is possible that cognitive degeneration can sneak up relatively undetected. Often it initially only affects limited aspects and is fairly easy for people to mask and present as typical.
Appreciate that, mate.
Cal’s still reasonably sharp IMO, but he’s just less & less able to conduct himself around. Like, when your legs go, that’s the thing?!
